I’m a survivor (sigh)

Today is a great day.  My wife concluded her six weeks of radiation therapy for breast cancer.  After having cancer cells successfully removed from both her breasts, we were told that the radiation treatments were  a precautionary measure just in case they missed some.  Mrs. Big Guy handled the challenge with flying colors.  Not only did she have to go for treatments five days a week, she started a new job to boot.  She is so strong and I am so proud of her.  She is amazing!  She is a survivor!

Somewhere during this journey, we learned the definition of cancer survivor varies.  But the one most widely used considers a person a survivor once they have been diagnosed with the disease.  Also included in this definition are the caregivers and loved ones of the cancer victim.  So that would include me.  At first, I thought it was a little bit of a stretch, but the more I thought about it, the more I came to accept the title.  I am a survivor!

I have always had a problem with panic and anger.  Over the past few years, I have worked on controlling it and have had much success.  I heard someone say the other day that all anger is caused by fear.  So if that is true, I should have been very angry over the last six months because I sure was scared.  The thought of losing my wife was crushing and the thought of her suffering was unbearable.  But something came over me when she was diagnosed.  I have to help her get through this.  This is my chance to make up for all those times I let her down in the past.  This is a time to be kind, and thoughtful, and understanding.  This is my opportunity to listen and be supportive.  It is time to be what a partner is supposed to be.  So I did it and let me tell you, it has been a privilege.  She is absolutely the best person I have ever known and I am so fortunate to have her in my life.

Now as our lives move on, and the fear of cancer diminishes, the challenges of every day life will start to slip back in and become more important.  But I will never let them get out of proportion and overwhelm us again.  They will always be below the line.  Above the line will be us, our sons, our family, friends, and faith.  Cancer….see ya, Fear….bye bye, Anger….take a hike.  We are much stronger than you.  We are survivors!


2 Comments on “I’m a survivor (sigh)”

  1. Brian says:

    Way to go Big Guy and especially your lovely wife. I’m proud of my old buddy and I hope that one of these days we can get together and lie to Mrs Big Guy about the good old days. Keep up your good works and remember you are still a work in progress.

  2. You are the best! I couldn’t have got through the last six months without you!


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